The sun rose slowly, as if it wasn't sure it was worth all the effort.

***

- DID YOU SAY HUMANS PLAY IT FOR FUN?
- Some of them get to be very good at it, yes. I'm only an amateur, I'm afraid.
- BUT THEY ONLY LIVE EIGHTY OR NINETY YEARS!

***

Galder: "I said I hope it is a good party."
Death: AT THE MOMENT IT IS. I THINK IT MIGHT GO DOWNHILL VERY QUICKLY AT MIDNIGHT.
Galder: "Why?"
Death: THAT'S WHEN THEY THINK I'LL BE TAKING MY MASK OFF.

***

- What is it that a man may call the greatest things in life?
- Hot water, good dentishtry and shoft lavatory paper.

***

The old shaman said carefully, "You didn't just see two men go through upside down on a broomstick, shouting and screaming at each other, did you?"
The boy looked at him levelly. "Certainly not," he said.
The old man heaved a sigh of relief. "Thank goodness for that," he said. "Neither did I."

***

Early to rise, early to bed, makes a man healthy, wealthy and dead.

***

Rincewind knew what orgasms were, of course, he'd had a few in his time, sometimes even in company...

***

The druid stiffened. "*Nice?*" he said. "A triumph of the silicon chunk, a miracle of modern masonic technology -- nice?" "Oh, yes," said Twoflower, to whom sarcasm was merely a seven letter word beginning with S.

***