Rincewind wanted to say: Look, what you should do is stop all this messing around with chemicals in a dark room and have a shave, a haircut, a bath, make that two baths, buy yourself a new wardrobe and get out of an evening and then ... and then you could have your face slapped by the woman of your choice.
I mean, it wouldn't be much, but it would be body contact.

***

Demons have existed on the Discworld for at least as long as the gods, who in many cases they closely resemble. The difference is basically the same as that between terrorists and freedom fighters.

***

He could shout "help!" in fourteen languages and scream for mercy in a further twelve.

***

These people were not only cheering, they were throwing flowers and hats. The hats were made of stone, but the thought was there.

***

Rincewind: "There's a door."
Eric: "Where does it go?"
Rincewind: "It stays where it is, I think."

***

Rincewind: "Let's run away."
Eric:"Where to?"
Rincewind: "Don't you worry about to. In my experience that always takes care of itself. The important word is away."

***

The trouble is that things never get better, they just stay the same, only more so.

***

Eric: "What're quantum mechanics?"
Rincewind: "I don't know. People who repair quantums, I suppose."

***

Now [Rincewind] realised what made boredom so attractive. It was the knowledge that worse things, dangerously exciting things, were going on just around the corner and that you were well out of them.

***

"Multiple exclamation marks," he went on, shaking his head, "are a sure sign of a diseased mind."

***